20 Funny Quotes That Make You Laugh
1) The man who views the world at 50 the same as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life. - Muhammed Ali.
2) The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education. - Albert Einstein
3) I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. - Lily Tomlin
4) Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't. - Erica Mann Jong
5) People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily. - Zig Ziglar
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6) I've always been in the right place and time. Of course, I steered myself there. - Bob Hope
7) By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day - Robert Frost
8) Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly. - Dalai Lama
9) I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying. - Oscar Wilde
10) The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. - Robert Frost
11) If you don't run your own life, somebody else will. - John Atkinson
12) Many of us spend half of our time wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing. - Alexander Woollcott
13) The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale. - Arthur Clarke
14) Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow. - Mark Twain
15) You grow up the day you have your first real laugh -- at yourself. - Ethel Barrymore
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16) Life is like a sewer... what you get out of it depends on what you put into it. - Tom Lehrer
17) Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. - Dale Carnegie
18) The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. - Oscar Wilde
19) Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. - Jim Carrey
20) I was called fat the other day and I said, "Yeah, well you are ugly and I can diet.” - Captain Insano
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